The woodlands were damp
and dark that April night, her eyes reflected magnificently in the
moon's glow. I was neither handsome nor cool. But she was stupid, so
I convinced her I was both handsome and cool. She looked up at me,
“You must be the
tallest in this whole country!”
She hadn't seemed to
notice I was sitting atop a tree.
“Of course I am! Come
sit up here by me, my dear. It's cold down there on the grass, and up
here we can see the whole town, all the houses!”
She tried. Boy, did she
try. But those stubby legs were getting her nowhere.
“Come on, I ain't got
all night darlin'!”
After 45 minutes of
watching her struggle I made my way carefully down in an awkward,
about to lose my footing sort of fashion, like the hero I am.
Rubbing my cheek against hers, I said,
“Let's take a walk,
baby. There's a house yonder I have my eye on.”
Now is when I, Laura D,
the editor of this beautiful story must insist on cutting in and then
cutting out what the original author had written next. It was graphic
and unnecessarily silly.
And now is when I, the CEO of D-LightFilled Publishing®,
for legal reasons would like to step in and clarify a few things:
- The author of this story is one “Stripey the Cat”
- The editor of this story is one Laura D McBryde
- The CEO of D-LightFilled Publishing® is that same Laura D McBryde, or maybe it isn't, you don't know.
Now that's all out of
the way...this story was based on a true one.
Stripey, one April
night, impregnated Cali the kitten, who then came to live with the
CEO of D-LightFilled Publishing®
and gave birth, hence how our whole family is now stupid with cats.
All of this was fine until recently when Mr Stripey rediscovered
where Cali lives and has moved himself and all of his belongings in
(including his....wait, what's the organ that produces farts? Because
he's certainly moved that into the house too).
IF YOU KNOW THIS GUY
PLEASE CONTACT ME @lauradmcbryde on Twitter or in the comments here.
Here's his picture. He
had it done by a professional using some money I had set aside for
the icey.
IF YOU WANT TO KNOW
THIS GUY PLEASE CONTACT ME @lauradmcbryde on Twitter or again, in the comments here.
Thank you.
